The Sonic the Hedgehog OVA is a 1999 anime adaptation of the best-selling SEGA franchise of the same name. It is the subject of one of James' early written Tirades and is among the most confusing subjects that James has ever covered.
Notable Characters[edit | edit source]
- Sonic the Hedgehog
- Miles "Tails" Prower
- Knuckles the Echidna
- Dr. Robotnik
- President of the Land of the Sky
- Metal Sonic
The insanity of it all[edit | edit source]
- Sonic acts like a humongous douche the entire movie, and at one point, actually refuses to help his best friend, Tails
- Knuckles is no longer the protector of the Floating Island. He is now a treasure hunter. Fuck. You.
- Sara, the President's daughter, is the most unlikeable bitch since Nomi Malone.
- Her father is also a protagonist? since he's such an incompetent idiot. (He actually lets Sara play video games with Dr. Robotnik!!!)
- By process of elimination, Tails is the real protagonist of the OVA.
- The voice acting is atrocious across the board except for Knuckles.
- The animation is almost unwatchable.
- There are several moments that were censored in many copies of the American dub. The VHS was left intact:
- Sonic actually flips Robotnik off in the ruins of Robotropolis. (See above.)
- Sara is seen breastfeeding one of hers and Robotnik's nine children in a dream sequence.
- Speaking of which, Robotnik gropes Sara on at least one occasion.
- Tails grabs Sara's breasts (albeit accidentally...maybe).
- Metal Sonic flies through Robotnik's hovercraft and is shown staring up Sara's skirt and soon thereafter, Sonic falls on his groin.
All of those things listed above were in a movie rated 7+, folks.
Review[edit | edit source]
James' written reviews are typically spoiler-heavy and linear with a beat-by-beat style, but this movie was too convoluted for him to do that, so he debuted the "10 Questions" format, where he posed a question (most of which were rhetorical) and then proceeded to answer it in a sardonic matter. See also: Logic Shotgun
Score[edit | edit source]
15/100: James actually recommended that people seek it out and watch it to fully comprehend how insane it is.
Tagline[edit | edit source]
"Scrape your knuckles. Catch some tails."
I have no idea what the hell that is supposed to mean.
Tiradesverse tropes[edit | edit source]
- Protagonists? - Everyone on the hero side except Tails
- Real protagonist - Tails
- Casio Keyboard - Likely used for the whole soundtrack
- Movie hacking